Have you ever just sat somewhere and thought to yourself "this is my happy place"?
Think about it. Not just yeah this is pretty great, but that deep deep if I ever have to leave here I'll crumble and fall state of being. That, I know when shit gets rough or things don't go as planned that when I'm here, all is right with the world. Because this is where your grounded, this is where you've planted your tribe.
For some, like in any comical movie about anger, frustration, or anxiety it's a state of being. Verbal reminders to ones self to "find your happy place". A poster of the beach, a memory of childhood splendor, a cross legged meditation chanting the word "om".
For so many years I had one... and one only, happy place. I could visit it whenever I wanted and knew when I was there I was safe from every thing both environmental and mental/emotional. I could get to it by car,through dreams, or traveling through my minds eye.
It was mine and it was sacred.
About five years ago now (I could be off by a few), my happy place was taken away quite abruptly. I was left with only a mental map. Fragments of memory scraps in my hands. For the longest I couldn't bare to return, a prolonging of pain I suppose. We all do it... put off the hurt we know we need to feel in order to move on. I did however in time, say my goodbyes. It was then that I allowed the sweet scent of remembrance to grow like a field of wild flowers in my heart.
For awhile after, my happy place was a lost place and so was I. A clouded period of my life where storms overpowered the sun rays.
Endurance = a higher state of being/ understanding/ personal growth.
Never get stuck, I learned that.
And so, just the other day I had a pretty big realization. That I had once again found my happy place. Not just found it, but felt a sense of being deeply rooted to it. Bound even. I realized not only had I found that sense of peace, but that I was recreating the happy place of my past. Right here. Right now. By getting my hands in the dirt, and bysurrounding myself with the environment that I've craved for so long. A wide open space encapsulated by familiarity. The slow up and down lullaby of the chickadee's sweet "tseeeee tseeeee" song. The coo of the mourning dove and the cracking open of seed at my feeder. An abode where I can check on plant growth while also growing the limbs of my family tree. Here I can pass down the traditions I was given and watch them live on in my children. A corner of the world where I can sip coffee with my love, and get lost in the day doing nothing in particular.
I just love being here.
In this sanctuary of us.
This place we call home, it's not just numbers on a mailbox or a place we rest our heads... but a living breathing entity where we lace up all of the things that we do, say, and feel as we live a life unplanned.
It's a good life. This is my good life.
Be it ever so humble... there is no place like home.